


Awakening

by Rhoswen19



Category: NCIS: Los Angeles
Genre: Angst, Coma, Complete, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Hospitals, Hurt, Hurt/Comfort, Recovery, Whump
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-14
Updated: 2012-11-14
Packaged: 2017-11-18 16:05:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,937
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/562863
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rhoswen19/pseuds/Rhoswen19
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kensi's been sitting at her partner's bedside for days now. He's oblivious to her presence, he's uncommunicative and he's very still; three things never associated with Deeks before the sudden turn of events during the last case. Anxiety is getting the best of her and even though she'd never admit it, she wants him up and annoying her because the alternative just isn't an option.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys, I had this writing exercise where I had to describe a coma patient's awakening in only 500 words. Thing sat in my computer for a couple of years before I decided to expand it and this is the end product

Kensi stood at the foot of the bed. He still looked pale, although not as pale as he had been a week ago, when they brought his almost lifeless, blood-covered body through to the Emergency Room. She shuddered at the memory, still able to see the pool of blood on the sidewalk, after the target had shot him instead of the girl they were trying to rescue. She had demanded to accompany him in the ambulance, therefore witnessing the attempts to keep him alive until they reached the hospital and they whisked him away through some doors where she couldn't follow.

She'd been waiting forever for him to wake up.

If she could bully him into waking up she would, but she had no idea what was going on inside his mind. She had a good idea what went inside his body, but that was through the doctor's extensive report. She asked the doctor to level with her and give her the truth and the truth is what she got. She got all the unpleasant details about how the bullet's path wreaked havoc inside him. How it missed his heart but nicked the pulmonary artery. How it collapsed a lung and caused internal bleeding. It had been touch and go for the first couple of days. The doctor didn't give them false hope; he kept saying "We're doing what we can," or "He's holding his own," or something equally non-committal. And yet she had no idea what was going on inside his head, if he was living in a nightmare or if he was inside some dirty fantasy of his.

He finally began stabilizing three days after the shooting. His vital signs had been improving slowly but surely since then. She looked down at him and still cling to hope. Deeks was not supposed to be silent; he was not supposed to look vulnerable and fragile. She could only sit by his bedside, talk to him and watch how his once full of emotions face had been steadily looking as if void of life for the past week. She couldn't help but to be reminded of Callen. Last time it had been him in that bed fighting to live and he pulled through. Deeks had to do the same.

Someone walked into the room and she recognized her favorite nurse. "Hey Stacy."

"Hello dear, I'm just gonna refresh the antibiotics for your boy here; we don't want that infection to come back, do we?

"He's not my boy, Stacy."

"You know what I mean, Kensi" She had a sweet voice, caring eyes and pretty much the whole 'warm' package. If Deeks only knew she had been providing him with his sponge baths! He probably wouldn't mind, Stacy was still beautiful for her age and Deeks had no problem with older women. But if Kensi liked Stacy, it was because she showed that positive attitude she needed. "How is he?" Stacy checked the vital signs and changed the IV bag.

"His vital signs have been steadily getting stronger. Dr. Fuller started weaning him from the ventilator today. He thinks it may be time to let him do some of the work."

"He thinks Deeks is ready?"

"That's what the vital signs are saying." Kensi allowed herself to smile. Finally, some good news.

"I know the waiting seems never ending but his injuries were severe and he needed his rest."

"I know but I want him up and annoying me." She quickly realized she said that out loud and desperately looked at Stacy "Don't tell him I said that."

"I won't" she chuckled and continued "You've been a great partner, but he's going to need your support and patience when he wakes up. The recovery part is not easy, and I'm sure he will annoy and even anger you. Although, I think this is not news to you; I've seen his scars."

"Is not, but it kind of comes with the territory."

"Let me tell you something. My mother was convinced she was a psychic, and I can tell you right now, she couldn't see a damn thing even if it was staring at her right in the face. But I've seen so many people come and go through these halls for so many years, I've learned how to read people, and your partner right here is strong yet vulnerable. He might be silly at times and fix everything with a joke, but that's just to distract people while he collects himself." That drew a small smile out of Kensi. "He looks like a big goofball." Stacy winked at Kensi. "So now, he needs time to get himself together…by taking some time off from the real world."

"I just want him to be okay."

"I know sweetheart, and he will be. A handsome fighter like him won't stay down for long. He has to impress the ladies with the stories of his scars."

"Seems like you know him pretty well."

"I've seen many like him before." – She scribbled something in the chart. – "Here we call it the hero complex, but I suspect your partner is the real deal."

"Another thing you shouldn't tell him or his ego will grow two sizes."

"Fine, but I'll definitely have a talk with him about having some self-preservation. He cant keep collecting scars like this."

Stacy patted her on the shoulder before leaving. "I'll be at the nurse's desk if you need me." And Kensi went back to guarding her partner's sleep.

"She's right you know… about that self-preservation thing. If Hetty has a say in it you'll be a great agent, but you need to learn to take care of yourself too, and you're not very good at it." She can't really stand the beeping interrupting the silence so she continues talking. "The girl is fine. You actually got to her in time. You also got the guy…but you need to work on your timing next time." Kensi got up from the chair, worked all of the kinks and knots of her body and started pacing.

She could tell it was dark outside… another day had gone by. Another day her partner lay in a hospital bed. Another day he was still breathing through a tube. Hopefully that would change soon.

Kensi looked at the door to check no one would see her and placed a tender kiss on his head before leaving for the night. She didn't cross path with Hetty as the latter made her way into Deeks room. The small woman sat on the chair Kensi had just vacated minutes before.

"She cares a great deal about you. The whole team does, and they miss you dearly." She took a moment to just look at him. "I believe you have taken enough time young man. Carolyn is in perfect health, although there might be a case of transference there; you are her hero now. My point being, life goes on, you managed to save her so you can stop this nonsense and come back to us. I can make it an order if you prefer."

He remained unresponsive. "Not to worry, Mr. Deeks, I'm a very patient woman." She opened her book and just sat by his bedside and read for hours.

He opened his eyes in a lazy attempt to see where he was; there was a dull ache throughout his body, and he could feel the cold temperature seeping through the sheet covering him. He would need to remind someone to turn down the air conditioner; he was a human being for crying out loud not a frozen dinner package in a fridge. Suddenly he got the nagging feeling that something was wrong. His senses were kicking in one at the time, but taking their sweet time doing so. He knew he was awake but his vision was not working. He wanted to speak, but something prevented him from doing so, and he suspected it had something to do with the plastic taste in his mouth. He wanted to get up, but his body wouldn't respond to any of his commands, only sending ripples of pain throughout every single one of his cells. Something  _was_  seriously wrong. He wanted to groan and moan, but the sounds never made it past his lips.

It seemed like the only sense that hadn't let him down was his hearing. There were beepings, some faster than others, and there was a whooshing sound too. Not sure what it meant, he kept fishing for more sounds. That's when he heard it, a female voice. The fog in his mind wasn't allowing for much coherent thought or anything at all really, but there was just something about the voice that was talking to him. It wasn't Kensi's, that much he knew. He focused hard on the voice and tried muting every other sound in the room. He figured it could only be the other woman who gave a crap about him; Hetty. She was there with him. His vision was somewhat clearer now, so he moved his head enough to see her. He needed to make sure it was 't all in his head. He needed to see with his own eyes that she was really there. And she was. He forgot the pain, the cold, the beeps, and concentrated on her. She was reading out loud but then she stopped. "Welcome back Mr. Deeks." She said and continued reading. He could no longer keep his eyes open so he let the sound of her voice lull him back to sleep.

Kensi took the day off after Hetty called her to say Deeks had briefly woken up the night before. When she got to the hospital he looked the same to her, but Hetty was sure he would wake up today and she had to be there for him. She didn't want him to wake up alone. It was now midafternoon and he still slept unaware of her presence. She started pacing, getting all anxious and somewhat disappointed too.

Two hours later she saw his eyes twitching. "Come on, Deeks. Wake up or I'll punch you for keeping me waiting all this time." He didn't open his eyes in a lazy attempt to see where he was. No, he snapped them wide open and got all worked up. The heart monitor was going crazy trying to keep up with the accelerating beats of his heart. He was in full panic mode.

"Nurse!" Kensi yelled at the same time she pushed the call button.

"Take it easy, Deeks. You're on the ventilator. Just focus on me, look at me. I'm right here." But in his haze, the words weren't getting through and she alone couldn't hold him down with the sudden strength he displayed. Next thing she knew, he was ripping the tube out and there was blood coming down the corners of his mouth. The doctor and nurses crowded him, and pushed her out of the room.

Outside she paced and called Hetty. Minutes later Dr. Fuller came out to talk to her.

"Is he alright?"

"He's going to be fine. We sedated him. Unfortunately, waking up to having something jammed down your throat can feel as bad as it sounds and some patients panic. He only did superficial damage by taking the tube out himself so his throat will be even sorer for a while. We'll be moving him to a regular room soon. You can relax now, the worse is over."

She smiled and thanked him before she went back in the room. She was surprised to find Deeks fighting to stay awake. He would close his eyes and lazily open them again. He was losing the fight to stay conscious. Kensi took his hand and cradled it between hers to ground him. "It's okay Deeks. I'm here and I'm not going anywhere. I promise I'll be right here when you wake up," she said reassuringly and felt him squeeze her hand firmly. As his grip relaxed, his eyes closed and he drifted back off to sleep.

Several hours later, Deeks regained consciousness again. He was visibly relieved to discover that the ventilator was gone for good and replaced with an oxygen mask. The head of the bed was slightly elevated to help with his breathing. He struggled for several minutes before getting his eyes fully open. "Remember running...to get… the girl" he said in a voice slightly louder than a whisper while his breath fogged the mask.

"You were shot when you used your body to shield her. And yes, she's fine"

"How?"

"You weren't wearing your vest."

"Oh…" He closed his eyes tightly, and Kensi didn't know if he was trying to remember or if he was in pain.

"How you feeling?"

"Like I was hit… by a truck." That answered her question.

"Want me to get the nurse, get you something for the pain?" He shook his head. "You seriously have to stop getting shot."

He didn't have the energy to get into that so he changed the subject. "You ate… my Jell-O?"

"Not yet."

"Thank you."

"For what, not eating your Jell-O? Because the moment you fall asleep again, it is gone."

"…being here…"

"Nowhere else I rather be partner."

 

TBC


	2. Chapter 2

"Miss Blye, a word?" Kensi followed Hetty into her office and watched her sit on her chair before taking a stand in front of the desk.

"Yes?"

"How's Mr. Deeks doing?"

"He's weak and still in a great deal of pain, not that he'd ever admit to it, but he's on the road to recovery."

"That's understandable given his condition, but you give me the impression that something else is troubling you."

"I'm worried about him, Hetty."

"What seems to be the problem, my dear?"

"I feel like Deeks is not coping so well with what happened."

"Well, Mr. Deeks is a very lucky man and he did a brave thing when he jumped in front of that bullet. I believe he's having trouble with how long is taking him to recover rather than with the events that transpired. Just give him some space, dear. He'll be back to his normal self in no time."

"Thank you."

Back at the hospital, Deeks had been moved to a regular room and soon after that he began his respiratory therapy. Dr. Fuller wanted to make sure the time Deeks spent on the ventilator wouldn't set back his recovery by allowing pneumonia to set in as it happened in many cases. The first time Deeks did his deep breathing exercises, he felt like an idiot. He was a grow man blowing air into a tube so that a tiny ball could bounce. The fact that by the end of the silly exercise he was coughing and even a little light headed didn't improve he's feelings much. It made him realize just how weak he truly was. A combination of the hurting, frustration and the thought of all the long weeks ahead made his confidence wavered.

According to his doctor, his recovery was right on track. As soon as his breathing improved they moved forward with the physical therapy. Deeks knew it was going to be a pain in the ass but starting PT meant he could get his body back into shape and that would speed things up for him.

"Name's Mark and I'll be your PT guy."

"Deeks"

"Nice to meet you Deeks, we're going to start by slowly building your strength back with short walks around the floor. Today, we just want to get your circulation flowing and your muscles moving."

"Sounds good but I have to tell you I can probably do a few laps instead."

"From what I understand, you were shot in the chest while in the line of duty. So, how about we try timing your laps tomorrow and just take the easy way out today."

It took Deeks a couple of minutes to get control of his unsteady legs. Being upright for the first time in a week brought a mixed of emotions for him. Standing on his own two feet made him feel better about the situation, but at the same time it made every single cell in his body scream in pain. The last time he was in this situation Kensi's life was in danger and the adrenaline made things a lot easier. He didn't have adrenaline in that moment but he had determination so he pushed through the pain and took his first steps.

He had to stop and rest a few times because his body was aching and he quickly tired. Of course, he tried disguising the pit stops as flirting with the nurses but the out of breath sounds made it obvious he was trying to do more than his body could at the moment. Apparently determination alone wasn't going to get him where he wanted to be faster. Mark noticed the fatigue signs and suggested they went back to the room. Deeks agreed because even though he wasn't going to admit it out loud, he really needed to lie down.

Slowly and painfully, he moved across the room and sat on the edge of the bed feeling weak and beyond exhausted. His muscles ached and he was drained of all energy. He leaned back against the pillows. God, everything hurts- he thought. Just when he closed his eyes ready to fall asleep a voice coming from the corner of the room startled him.

"Want me to call the nurse?"

His body's reaction to what he perceived as a threat had him cursing. "Damn you Sam!"

"I'm taking that as a yeah."

"I'm fine."

"'Course you aretough guy."

"Where's the love man? And why are you hiding in the shadows? This isn't one of those training things Hetty ordered, right?"

"Relax, I'm here just to check up on ya."

"Awww I'm touched."

"So how are you holding up besides being in extreme pain?"

"Who told you that? Was it Kensi? 'cause I'm not… okay fine, maybe a little bit."

"It's normal Deeks, you should've seen G. He too tried to play it cool but it's hard when half your body feels like it's on fire."

"I take it you've been shot before." Sam shrugs his shoulders. "Why won't you guys fess up to it? Will that ruin your reputation as super agents, is that it?"

Sam just smiled clearly amused while Deeks added "I got shot before, it was my fault but I'm not afraid to admit it."

"This one kinda was your fault too."

Deeks found a comfortable spot in the bed and defended his actions "I had a split second to make a decision. Rather it was me than a teenage girl."

"Not judging you Deeks, I think any one of us would've done the same." There was a moment of silence and Sam thought Deeks had fallen asleep. "I got shot once on a mission gone wrong."

Deeks felt like he was sinking deeper into the darkness but he had to ask. "Where?"

"That's classified."

"I don't mean the place."

"That's classified too."

"You guys are no fun." Sam could hear the drowsiness in Deeks' voice.

"Just hang in there Deeks, it'll get easier." That was the last thing he heard before sleep washed over him like a wave he couldn't surf.

When he opened his eyes again he noticed it was morning. He must have been truly exhausted to sleep for that long. He looked at the ceiling, it was too quiet. Silence allowed for thoughts, he did not care for, to intrude his mind. So he decided to take a shower in hopes it would help him relax a little. Once in the bathroom he brushed his teeth and looked at his reflection. His eyes had sunken and his hair looked all flat and devoid of life. He looked down at his chest and peeled off the gauze concealing his scar. It looked red and angry in contrast with his older scars. And the thought occurred to him that collecting scars wasn't a good hobby.

Deeks wasn't surprised when he got out of the bathroom and Callen was waiting for him by the window. After Sam's impromptu visit he knew Callen would pop eventually.

"You look like crap."

"I already had that conversation with the mirror but thanks for mentioning it. You guys got a schedule or something?"

"You saying you don't want us dropping by?"

"That's not… what? That's a trick question, isn't it?"

"Just showing support Deeks, nothing else."

"In that case, it's much appreciated." He moved to his bed and raised the upper part so he was in a sitting position.

"Having people that care about you around helps, you know."

"Look at you being all wise, does Hetty know you're trying to take her job?" they both looked at the door and waited for the small woman to make an appearance.

"I thought you'd know better by now."

"What can I say? I like tempting fate."

"That's not healthy Deeks. So, how's therapy going?"

"Oh you know a little frustration and a lot of sadomasochism will supposedly help you recover."

"Whatever works, right?"

"Right."

"You sure you're doing alright?"

"Yep."

"Just need to relax; you'll get there."

"Is that what you did?"

"You've been talking to Sam, haven't you?" Callen tried to suppress a smile but felt the corner of his mouth twitch.

"Maybe…"

"Don't listen to me, okay? Listen to your body. We're still gonna be here and so will your job. I suggest you take it one day at the time; otherwise Hetty will have a say in the matter and your sick days will automatically get extended with no pay."

"I don't like the sound of that at all."

"It's a great motivation, isn't it?"

"Hey guys!" Kensi greeted them.

"And that's my cue to leave. Take care Deeks."

"Why leaving so soon?"

Callen shrugged his shoulders before saying to Kensi."Tag you're it."

"Funny!" Deeks almost yelled so that Callen could hear him through the closing door.

"Deeks, your sarcasm is showing."

"Getting shot has that effect on me."

"Feeling better I see."

"Much."

"Any idea when you're getting out of here."

"If I could I'd be walking out of here right now."

"You almost bled to death, you had extensive surgery and you were in a coma for almost a week, I'd say there's no need for rushing things."

"When you say it like that it sounds unreal."

"It was very real." They look into each other's eyes in silent understanding.

"You wanna talk about it?"

She shook her head in response "You?"

"Not really."

She got comfortable in the chair and propped her legs on his bed. "You should get some rest."

"I think that chair has a permanent impression of your rear end."

"Shut up and go to sleep before I knock you out Deeks."

They both smiled feeling like things were going back to normal.

During Deeks' morning PT session, his body was very stiff and the laps he hoped he could do were even harder than the previous day. Mark told him that his muscles were sore do to the exercise and that it would go away the more he used them. They cut the session short and returned to his room. An hour after Mark left, Deeks stretched like he normally did and walked around the room. He attempted to work on his abs, but after ten he sat straight because the pressure in his chest was too much and he let out a quiet gasp.

He got up and in uncharacteristically Deeks fashion; he screamed in anger "I hate this!" and punched the mattress out of frustration.

"I'm sorry…" he spun around at the sound of the soft female voice.

"Oh Carolyn, I didn't see you there."

"I'm sorry." The teenager repeated.

"Sweetheart, come here." He patted the mattress inviting her to sit next to him. "I want you to know this was not your fault."

"But you got shot because of me!" the tears started falling and she did nothing to stop them.

"It was not your fault, okay? I don't even blame the guy that shot me."

"But you're in pain and you sounded so upset when I walked in."

"First of all, I want you to know that I'd do it all over again because it means that something great came out of it. You are safe and unharmed."

"But you don't even know me."

"It's my job to protect others, it doesn't matter if I know them or not. Plus it's a bonus when it's a cutie like you."

"Why were you so upset when I came in?"

"Because I'm a very independent guy and I need to learn to slow down a bit and even accept help every now and then."

"Do you need help now?"

"Nah, I'm good but thanks"

"I should probably get back to my mom."

"That sounds like a good idea."

"Can I hug you?"

"Go for it kid."

"Take care."

"You too, sweetie."

Once Carolyn left, Deeks settled into bed and closed his eyes. The pain in his chest didn't magically disappear but some of the weight he was carrying had been lifted. Somehow explaining things to Carolyn had made him realize it was okay if his body took longer to get there because she was safe. He heard a faint sound and maybe the guys were rubbing off on him because he was sure he knew who had just entered his room.

"Why do I get the feeling this was your doing?" he said without actually opening his eyes.

"I'm afraid I don't know what you are referring to."

"Okay, just remember two can play that game Hetty." This time he looked at her and even gave her one of his goofy grins.

"And you'd be wise not to play it with me."

"Got it."

"How are you feeling?"

"Much better."

"I'm glad to hear that. I was chatting with your doctor and it looks like you're going to be discharged tomorrow."

"Hetty, I think I love you. That's the best news I've heard in a while"

"While appreciated, that's hardly appropriate Mr. Deeks."

"I know you love me too."

"Cheeky bastard."

"What you got there?"

"It's called a book."

"You going to read to me?" He sounded like a little kid but he didn't care. Something about having Hetty read to him made him feel all warm inside like a gooey chocolate chip cookie.

"If you allow me."

"Please."

He let Hetty's voice sooth him and didn't even notice when she left or when he fell asleep. Next morning, he was more than ready to leave the hospital. He didn't even care about continuing his PT sessions as an outpatient as long as he could go back to his apartment. His spirit had lifted considerably after Carolyn's and Hetty's visit the day before and he had a new view on the whole experience. His recovery was looking up and he was looking forward to his yoga classes and surfing again and definitely about going back to work. Deeks felt like life was back on track for him.

He took a quick breath and a step forward. He's been at this for a couple of days now but his body still tensed with stress and frustration. He inhaled through his nose and exhaled through his mouth. It made it easier on his chest now that he was more aware of his limitations. Today he was breaking out but there was one thing he had to do before he could leave the hospital. He walked to the elevator, the doors opened and he stepped inside. He's feeling rather good today so he pushed the button that would take him to his destination and leaned against the wall waiting for the 'ding'. When the doors opened again he stepped out and walked to the nurse station.

"Hello there. How can I help you?" the young nurse smiled at him.

"Can you tell me where I can find Nurse Stacy?"

"Sure thing, she's that lovely lady walking this way."

"Thanks." he said winking at her and walking towards the older woman.

"Nurse Stacy?"

"Marty! You look great young man. How you feeling?"

"Much better I just wanted to thank you. From what I hear you took good care of me and of Kensi."

"It was my pleasure. How's that girl doing?"

"She's good. She's actually picking me up today to take me home. She'll probably be pissed because I disappeared on her."

"Trust me she's just glad that you're up and annoying her." He let out a hearty laugh.

"Somehow I doubt that." He leaned down and kissed her on the cheek. "Thank you for being there for her, it means a lot to me."

"Just take better care of yourself and that way you won't have to worry about that wonderful girl. Now don't get me wrong but go, leave and don't come back here unless you're visiting someone, okay?"

"You got it, beautiful!" and with that he left.

When he got back to his room he was tired and a very pissed Kensi was standing next to a nurse carrying his discharge papers. "You're unbelievable, you know that?" He sat on the wheel chair. "I'm adorable, right?" he gave the nurse a boyish smile and she couldn't help but to smile back much to Kensi's annoyance. "Please, don't encourage him."

"I'm sorry." said the nurse between giggles.

"You're definitely feeling better."

"Oh yeah."

Finis


End file.
